Habitual neglect

Has it really been six months since I updated this blog?!? GEEZ! Time flies!!

So much has happened in the past 6 months....

• Christmas came and went...The girls absolutely had a blast! Audrey started figuring out the whole Santa thing, and they both LOVED getting gifts. I think Olivia loved ripping the paper more than the gifts, but it was fun anyway! Audrey still asks when Christmas is coming back, and why it has to be over. She also LOVES snow! Every time it snowed this year, we had to take her out to play.
• I am 80% sure we are going to have to do some sort of speech therapy with Olivia. She does say some words very clearly, and she associates words with objects, but she has a hard time overall.
• Olivia never sits still!! This kid goes full speed, non stop every minute she is awake.
• Olivia is the epitome of a momma's girl. If she isn't with me, she is walking around the house yelling, "Mooommmmma" I don't mind, but I am trying to make her a little less dependent, so it doesn't turn into a socialization problem for her
• I am absolutely in awe of how different the personalities of these two are. I mean DIFFERENT! Audrey was a great baby; Olivia required more attention. I never had to tell Audrey "no" repeatedly, she would test her limits, and learn them quickly; Olivia just laughs and tests limits endlessly!!
• Audrey is currently in the full blown princess phase, (I hope it's just a phase anyway). I don't really mind the princess stuff, I just want to keep it at pretend play, and limit any "princess" attitude, which is proving difficult right now..

So...that is a brief, very brief, snap shot of the last 6 months.
We are nearing Audrey's 3rd birthday, and we have decided to scale back a little on the "party". It was not an easy decision, we have are dealing with alot right now, and  on top of that Audrey is having some type of stress/anxiety issue lately, so we felt it best to keep things simple. She has transitioned to the 3/4 year old room, started having bad dreams, and having drastic emotional reactions to the simplest things. I am not naive enough to think that all  of these things are "real issues", I know some of them are attention grabbers, and limit testing.  I can tell she is just being over the top when I tell her I can't understand her when she acts like a baby, and she immediately changes her actions.
But sometimes I think she really can't process whatever emotion she may be feeling. I called our pediatrician when I realized she was having the bad dreams more frequently. He knows her personality pretty well, so I felt comfortable talking to him about it. Audrey is a great sleeper....so when she kept waking up, I knew something was up.
 His opinion : Her little imagination is running wild, and she is having trouble processing. Basically...she is thinking alot, and having trouble turning her brain off, which translates into kiddie stress.  Poor kid, she inherited that from her momma! Add that to transitioning at daycare, seeing Olivia occupy 70% of my time, and general 3 year old development...She is just having a hard time.. That's the only way to say it.
We have started ignoring the whining & any and all tantrums. We have switched some things up at home, so I spend more one on one time with her, and I have started implementing "big girl time" where we do crafts, art, play, and on occasion paint our toenails or something similar. It seems to be helping, but we still have bad days.

 I love our pediatrician..seriously love him. He took 20 minutes out of his day to personally talk to me about Audrey instead of having a a nurse call me back, because he knows me & he knew how worried I was.

So....anyway, we are cooking out for Audrey's birthday. Of course her family is coming over, I will decorate, there will be cake and balloons, but I just want her to have fun and PLAY!!!! The following weekend is Easter and we always go out of town, so we will be taking cupcakes up there to celebrate with them, so she will still spend time with everyone.

Overall, the girls get along great. Audrey is very compassionate with Olivia. She is constantly trying to teach her something, "no Livi, that 's not buppy, his name is Mickey". She is the 1st to let me know when Olivia is crying or upset. She will get her the sippy cup.When Olivia is tired, Audrey will take her blanket to her, she even tries to teach her the rules. "No Livi, we can't touch that". If they are separated for any reason, Olivia constantly asks for "Audie", and every morning when Audrey walks downstairs, Olivia screams, yes, screams "Audie!!" She adores her big sister and wants to do everything Audrey does.

Current life status : Our "babies" are one and a half, and three. Our nephews are two and a half and six months. Time seriouslly needs to stand still!!  & we will be havina neice in July! That's alot of kiddos running around :)

Olivia is ONE

 Celebrating turning ONE with all the people who love her most ;)

 Birthday girl!

 

This kid LOVES her drums and all things music ;)

*Forgotten post*

Ok, so I *may* have neglected this blog a little too much, but our lives are slightly chaotic ;)

Anyway... Our sweet little Olivia will turning ONE on Sunday!! ONE!! As in she has been here with us an entire year, 365 days! What?!?!?! How can that be??  It quite literally seems like I was in the hospital giving birth YESTERDAY! ....but I am digressing..
The plan for this blog started out as a catch up on our life with 2 kids under 2 and a half, but I have had a ridiculously emotional week, dealing with Olivia turning ONE! So let's start there...

Anyone who knows us, knows our kids, especially Olivia, have been plagued with ear infections! Well, not much has changed, except we are on a 2 week stretch with Olivia not having one! ( I am almost afraid to type that sentence!) She is oh, so happy when she is ear infection free, so I am hoping this "stretch" lasts a long time. Our sweet little Lou ( trying to stop using that nickname, but it's so dang hard!) still sleeps with us more often, than not. She has been eating better recently, most likely due to healthy ears, but I will take what I can get! She uses a few words consistently, but not clearly. I am worried that the hearing impairment she suffered from the ear infections is going to have more of a lsting effect than we originally thought, but we will deal with it as we go. She crawls everywhere, pulls up consistently, and stands on her own occassionally, but she isn't walking yet. She LOVES music! She will shake her whole body, and swing her arms like she is dancing whenever music is on. Her favorite toys, are of course musical ones ;) I am the least musically inclined person on the planet, so I am working on how to encourage and develop her love of music. It's going to take some research, but in the mean time her Aunt and Uncle are pretty musically inclined, so we will just take cues from them and our nephew Kayden ;)  (Who, by the way, has a new adaorable little brother, Mykah!)

Olivia will be one in exactly 5 days and it is absolutely breaking.my.heart! I was horribly sad when Audrey turned one, and two, but for some reason little Olivia's birthday is hurting my heart in a different way! We have NOT taken #3 off the table, nor have we 100% decided there will be a #3, so I think part of the heartbreak is knowing she may really be "the baby." Meaning, she may be the last baby we have, so naturally she will always be my baby. I think there is a little more to it though. Audrey had ear infections , but she never really "needed" me. Most of the time they did not drastically affect her, and after 2 doses of antibiotic she was good to go! That is not the case with Olivia, she  wants her momma when she doesn't feel good, and you can tell she is in pain. I absolutely love and adore both of my girls, do not misunderstand that, but Olivia just needed more from me, and I think that is why turning one, and no longer being a baby is hurting my heart! As I  sit here typing, she is literally standing beside me saying"mommommommommom" and holding her arms up for me to hold her...Seriously this kid is too cute not to pick up and cuddle!!!

To put it quite simply, I am just not ready for my baby to be one!

Our weekend of nothing!

My mind has been constantly running at full speed for what feels like forever!! Livi is constantly (or so it seems) fighting an ear infection. As a result, her sleep pattern is anything but regular. So, add that to chasing a two and a half year old, deciding if I should apply for a promotion, nonsense with my mother (I use the term loosely), and Livi's upcoming pediatric opthomologist appointment, and the grand result is a super stressed, very very tired momma  also fighting off a ragweed attack!!

So, this weekend...we did nothing! I mean absolutely nothing! I took a nap with Livi twice, played outside with Audrey, played with Livi, taught Audrey to use cookie cutters with her playdoh, spent some time with our sweet new nephew, and just took time to breathe. Don't misunderstand me, I cooked and cleaned, picked up toys and did laundry, but only the necessities. I will probably pay for that later in the week, with a double load of household work, but that's ok.

It was nice to turn my brain off, if only for a few hours. Livi popped up with another da*n ear infection this weekend, so it wasn't quite as relaxing as I had hoped, but, that's all part of being a momma ;) I wouldn't trade it for anything!!

It was so nice to just be able to really spend time with the girls ; not while running errands, cleaning the house, or doing other "stuff".  They will be grown before I know it, and I will cherish every moment I can with them! I just hope those moments are plentiful!

We are both so caught up in being good parents. and making sure our girls are taken care of that sometimes we forget about the "Husband/Wife" part.`With two kids so close in age, it leaves very little time for me to spend with the husband. I haven't done a very good job with realizing this until recently. He NEVER complains, but honestly, it's no fun. He understands that I am a momma 1st and our girls need me now, and he is just fantastic with them!  We have several people we trust as babysitters, but we usually use them for "need/have to" situations, which doesn't help us relax or have a date night. It's a sacrifice we are both aware of, but hope it gets easier soon. I am not completely comfortable leaving either of the girls when they are sick or don't feel good, so in essence I put that limit on my self. But as I said, we had 2 kids very close in age, and I don't want to be the mom who "pawns" her kids off. Something will have to give soon though! I miss spending time with Jeremy, so we will figure it out....We always do ;)

Catching up...

I have missed so many things I intended to blog  about.....Livi got her ear tubes but still has some hearing difficulty that we are watching, I was offered a promotion (twice) at work, Audrey is learning something new everyday and acting more and more like a little girl, Livi is crawling, we had hardwood floor put in the entire 1st floor of the house, I reconnected with some family members that I lost contact with years ago, we just found out Livi may need surgery on her eye.....Need I go on??

As you can see...things have been a little crazy around here!! Most days that is an understatement....I actually started this post on August 2nd..I am finishing on August 29th. See what I mean ?!?


So here's a short catch up....

Livi started crawling 4 weeks ago, and she is off and exploring. She is all smiles 90% of the time, and she has  such a wonderful little gummy smile. We can see the beginnings of her 1st tooth coming through, so it looks like she will have them by the 10 month mark...I CANNOT believe my baby is already 9 months old!! At her check up she weighed in at 19 pounds! I think this little stinker is going to be a bit bigger than her little sister, probably by design, just in case she needs to defend herself (and I am sure she will!!) This little girl is such a sneak! She will creep around whatever Audrey is playing with and snatch it, crawl away and laugh..I am sure there is more of that in my future ;) She isn't sleeping in her room yet, but she is finally starting to sleep better so I am hoping to transition her soon. I love cuddling with my little girl, but it would be nice for the husband and I to have our bed back, and be able to get a good night sleep without waking up with a toe in my eye and her head in his armpit, or vice versa. But, babies are only babies for a little while, so I am soaking it up with my lil' pumpkin! Who knows how long it will be before I get to cuddle this much again, right?!?

Audrey, well, she is a mess! She is constantly learning something new, and amazing us with how quickly she problem solves and puts things together. Today she came home from daycare and said
"Mother (yes she said, mother) can we go to the zoo and see the tigers?" After I replied that we may do that later, since we have been recently, she said"That's ok we can just go to the park".  Wow! She can identify several letters, and gets her numbers in order most of the time. She can count objects up to three at this point, so we are working on both. She is just a little sponge soaking up everything she can. She speaks well for her age, so I am told. She acts so much older than 2, it is hard for me to remember that she is a toddler and I think I expect too much, so I am working on that!

Part II


As I finish this blog post, 27 days after I started it, I can report that Livi has 2 new bottom teeth, is picking up different sounds, and I am pretty sure she is trying to say "dog", which comes out "gog". We have also fought an ear infection since I started this post. Fun times. She is starting to pull up on the furniture, the leg of my pants, the pack-n-play, and anything she can get her hands on. Last night she "walked" behind her activity table as it slid from the couch to the entertainement center. I am on borrowed time with this one ;) She will be off and running in no time.

I worried for a long time, about "being enough mom" for both girls. So many thoughts ran through my head "Can you really love any other baby like you love Audrey?, Are you really going to be able to divide your time with 2 kids so close in age?? Are you going to be able to give them all the love they need?" etc. etc. etc. These thoughts plagued my mind; revolving door stlye. I realized recently, though that  God designed a momma's heart to hold so much more love than I thought was possible. The amount of love I have for my girls is overwhelming sometimes, but always wonderful! These girls were "wonderfully and fearfully" made and entrusted to me for a reason. We consider Audrey our miracle, and Livi our blessing...My girls not only have my heart, they are my heart!

I am signing off tonight, with a promise to myself to update this blog more often. I hope it will serve as a journal of sorts for my girls. I have to do better recording memories and their life as they grow up.....which will happen way too fast I'm sure!!

Incessant blogging...

I know I have bombarded this blog with posts lately, but I feel the extreme urge to catch up ;)

Livi, or Livi Louie as Audrey calls her, is almost 6 months old! Oh my goodness, where does the time go??
I can't believe it! She is something, this one! She is sitting up on her own, holding her own bottle and almost rolling over. She doesn't really seem interested in trying to roll over most of the time, so I am trying to "work" with her on it. She just honestly doesn't seem to care if she rolls over. I am ok with that since she is on target with everything else. She is starting to discover her "voice", and has almost given me a heart attack several times with a random squeal.. but it's quite adorable.

Sleep...well that's another story. She is not a natural born sleeper, like Audrey is, so that has been somewhat of a challenge. I think we have figured it out though. She has to have HER blankets, one side is silk/satin, the other a soft chenille (?). She has one that is just her blankie, the other is a full size blanket. Before we figured this out, sleeping was non existent. All of it wasn't her fault, she is a GASSY baby, and man, does she spit up! She could " easily win a baby toots competition", yes, that is a direct quote from our pediatrician.
We sit her upright for a minimum of 20 minutes after she eats and that alone has helped tremendously! She is not a "fussy" baby, she is just a little more particular than Audrey was. She has been consistently sleeping a solid 6 or 7 hours for almost a week now, so I consider that progress!

I am adamant that each of my girls be treated equally, but maintain their own unique personalities. We had a stumbling block earlier this month with our infant daycare teacher. She has really had a hard time differentiating between the two kids. She was absolutely marvelous with Audrey, but she wanted to treat Livi exactly the same way  she did Audrey. Well, that is a problem. Livi requires a little more attention and "work" than Audrey ever did. Livi has to have her blankets, has to be sat up after feeding, doesn't like to be rocked, doesn't like to be swaddled and burps and spits up constantly. Not recognizing these differences was making them both miserable. Jeremy and I both made trips down in the middle of the day to show Debbie how to handle Livi, and give her some pointers. This week was much better for the both of them!!

I cannot believe I will start making her baby food in less than 3 weeks. After her appointment the 1st week of May, I expect our pediatrician to give the go-ahead on real food!! EEK! It kind of worries me, especially with the gassiness...I guess we shall see how it works out!!

2 year check up and catch up....

So, as I have always said..Audrey's a little petite! She is in the 18th percentile in height and head circumference, and 38th percentile in weight. But she is very healthy. "Perfectly" healthy, and still ahead of the curve for a 2 year old. Her vocabulary is quite extensive for a 2 year old, the pediatrician was pretty impressed. She only had one shot today, and this time Jeremy took her. It's the 1st appointment I have missed, but I have missed several days of work since coming back from maternity leave, to take care of whoever is sick, so he volunteered. Thank goodness! He experienced first hand, the heart break of watching a kid get shots. No fun!!

There is pretty much nothing Audrey can't do. And there is nothing she will not attempt to do herself! Her favorite phrase, besides "no", is "I can do it!" I hear that in my sleep. We have actually altered our morning routine and I get up 20 minutes earlier to deal with and combat the "independence". Sheesh...I guess it's my fault! I always said I wanted her to be independent...Wish granted!

She is 90% potty trained only having the occasional accident. I can handle that. We are still using pull ups at night, but I hope to stop that relatively soon.

We are tweaking the discipline process right now. I REFUSE to spank at this age. I don't think it's constructive for anyone, and I will not compromise my relationship with my daughter, so that leaves time out and redirection. We honestly have not done a very good job being consistent, so that is changing immediately. 2 warnings, then timeout. No negotiating or excuses, no matter where we are. That's a struggle for us in certain situations, but it is in her best interest, and we are both committed to it. As I am typing this I realized that it sounds like we have to discipline Audrey all the time, which is not true. We rarely have to use any form of discipline, a simple "No" or "Stop" usually works. She has her bad days like every other kid, when we have to use time out ALOT, but those days are few and far between. I refuse to let her think bad behavior is acceptable, regardless of the situation. (teething, etc) I think this one is harder for Jeremy because she is a daddy's girl. I don't want to impede that relationship at all, but I don't want to be the only disciplinarian, so we have come to a happy compromise.

We shall see how it goes ;)