Audrey turned 2 yesterday & we had her birthday party today. It's crazy, but I am sad that she is growing up!! As I sit here thinking about it, I realize I should be careful what I wish for!
Last night, on her 2nd birthday, I was watching her sleep, wishing she was a baby again, instead of the "oh so independent" toddler she is quickly becoming. I longed to rock her to sleep, cuddle with her, or just feed her like I did when she was a baby. Oh how I miss that!!!! I am sure I always will....absolutely positive, actually! Don't get me wrong...I am so so proud of the independent little personality she is becoming. She always wants to do things herself, but in the words of her daycare teacher, she is "a very compassionate soul", and always wants to make others feel better. For example, yesterday I smashed my toe on the couch, and muffled several cuss words, she immediately ran over and put her hand on my back and said "momma, what's wrong?? It hurt?? I help you??" Immediately my heart melted! She has such a sweetness about her! But...Sometimes her independence is EXTREMELY hard to deal with as a momma, (seperate blog) but I always said, I want my girls to be independent...careful what you wish for, because this one, is INDPENDENT!!
Today, as the people who love her dearly, gathered to celebrate her turning 2, my girl decided to be crazily clingly to her momma. If you know my girl, you know this is NOT her!! She is never clingly! Warning sirens went off in my head... Later, in the middle of her party, we discovered that she has an ear infection. Nice! Well, I immediately felt like a horse's ass, and gave her medicine, but it was too late. She was unhappy and everyone knew it. For a fleeting moment, I felt bad for everyone sitting here, wanting to see the happy little, outgoing girl she is 99% of the time. Then, I was over it. My girl was upset, in pain, feeling awful, and wanted her momma! Well, she got her momma. Don't get me wrong, there were definitley some temper tantrums involved, that we WILL deal with going forward, but today...she was in a room of people in her territory, in pain, and uncomfortable. I was so sad for her. I know she loves to have fun, but unfortunatley today wasn't up for it today. I think I held her for 5 solid hours! Fortunately, everyone here understood. I mean, they have kids too. How could you not be empathetic??
She simmered down enought to open her gifts, after a dose of Tylenol. I think her favorite gifts came from Manda, Nana,Jennifer and Courtney. Now she gets to play basketball (Thanks Manda) , and play with her babydoll in a stroller &swing/high chair (Thanks Jennifer and Nana) while wearing cute shoes (Thanks Courtney). The best of all worlds as a girl!!
All in all ,I wanted my baby girl to need her Momma less than one day ago, but I never wanted her to be ill, and not enjoy her 2nd birthday. I really hope she gets better quickly and is finished with these blasted ear infections. I want my happy girl back...the heck with what I miss/want!!!
As we were winding down for the night, I was feeding Livi, and Daddy was going to put Audrey down, she ran up to me, threw her arms around my neck, squeezed oh so tight and said "I wuv you momma!". And that alone, made EVERYTHING worth it!!!
Oh my sweet girl...You are more loved than you know & understand and that will NEVER change!!
